During his interview with WEEI this morning, Gary Washburn said Carlos Boozer could be a wild card free agent signing for the Celtics.

“I would say a long shot would be Carlos Boozer,” Washburn said when asked for a player, besides the Millers, the C’s could be after.

This kind of reminds me of the Dumb and Dumber ”So you’re telling me there’s a chance?” scene. A chance, sure, but this is a million to one at best. First of all, Boozer’s in line for a big, big deal. Don’t think so? Well, there are a whole bunch of teams with a whole bunch of cap space, and only a few true max players. If there’s one thing I know about NBA GMs, it’s that they don’t keep cap space for later. They use it, now, regardless of whether players deserve the available money.

So Boozer is worth a lot more than the Celtics have to offer. Can you see him saying, “Oh, no. Please, I’m begging. I don’t want $15 million a year! Not when the Celtics are offering the mid-level exception!” Me neither. There are a few players who would sacrifice money for a chance at winning. Carlos Boozer doesn’t seem like one of them. If the deal did work, it would have to be a sign-and-trade. And, uhh, what exactly do the Celtics have to offer?

The deal doesn’t make basketball sense, either. Boozer’s too small to play alongside Kevin Garnett, and I hate to break it to you but I don’t think he’s willing to come off the bench.

So no, folks, I don’t think you’ll see Carlos Boozer in Green next season. Nor, I think, should you even really want him. Look at every recent champion — length kills, folks, and Carlos Boozer doesn’t have it.

Will it still be this familiar face leading the huddle?

On an interview with WEEI this morning, Gary Washburn said he expects Doc Rivers to stay on as head coach of the Boston Celtics.

“I think he stays,” Washburn said. “You don’t get that year back. You could coach a team, you could always have another opportunity to coach, but you don’t get another opportunity to coach the guys in that locker room.

“I think he realizes he’s not going to get a chance to coach three Hall of Famers again, even in his next job. I think he wants to take advantage of it. I think he probably enjoyed some of the things that went on in the playoffs and, you know, I think he wants to give it one last run. I think he really understands his place in Celtics history, in Celtics lore, and he wants to be a part of that.”

Washburn continued to discuss whether right now would be the best time for Doc to take a sabbatical. “I think he could take one next year. I think he’d much rather watch his son’s first and probably only year of college than to watch his senior year of high school, which is going to be somewhat anti-climactic once he picks a college. So I would think next year would probably be a better year for him to step away.”

If Rivers decides not to come back, Washburn said Kevin McHale would probably be the frontrunner to replace him. He and the interviewers also spoke of a strained relationship between McHale and Garnett, which I never knew about. I always thought the two were on great terms; I thought Garnett looks up to McHale and has always considered him a mentor.

Back to Doc. In an interview with the San Antonio Express-News, Rivers explained why the decision is such a tough one.

“I’m not going to get into the whole thing,” Doc Rivers said, “but I have four kids, and two of them are in college. Austin’s in high school, and I have a young one going to be a freshman in high school and I’ve already been gone (in Boston) for six years. “So, we still have an unbelievable relationship as a family,” he said. “As long as I think that’s intact, then that’ll make it an easier decision. But I want to make sure that’s there. We evaluate that every summer.”

Rivers also mentioned that he still loves coaching. The current roster, he says, has made coaching as fun as ever.

“That’s the toughest part about it,” he said.  “If you didn’t like coaching or you were burned out by coaching …  I’m not, actually.  Over the past year, I’ve been reinvigorated in some ways from the group (in Boston) that I have.  That’s what makes it so much more difficult for me.”

Though Doc has said he’d probably make a decision by July 1, he also told the Express-News, “I’m just going to take my time.”

I say we let Doc take the entire summer off. Let him recharge the batteries, travel the country watching his son play AAU basketball, and stay as far away from the Celtics’ Waltham practice facilities as he wants. The C’s have enough veterans to run offseason workouts by themselves, they don’t need a head coach overseeing their every move.

Anything to get Doc back. And maybe bribe his family or something. Or kidnap them, hold them hostage, and demand that Doc coach. Whatever it takes.

Would the Millers split the mid-level exception?

Today was the second time the Boston Herald has tossed Mike Miller’s name out there as a potential Celtic.

The Celtics will be equipped on Thursday with their mid-level exception and all of the veteran minimum deals they can throw at people. Expect Mike Miller – the talented wing for the Washington Wizards who once played for Rivers – to be a target.

But big men are the priority here. The question could very well be whether Brad Miller – a likely free agent cut to the wind because of Chicago’s max-contract concerns – feels he deserves an entire mid-level exception to himself.

But the Celtics will have to wait and let the saturated market finally convince a few players they’re not worth as much as they first thought.

I like both Mike and Brad Miller, and they both fit well. But… don’t the Celtics need to get a little more athletic? Don’t they need an infusion of a little youth? Don’t they need to sign free agents who aren’t the two worst players ever to play for Team USA? Don’t they?

P.S. – Brad Miller has a tattoo of the And1 logo. I’d rather have a tattoo of Kobe raising the Larry O’Brien Trophy. Actually, on second thought, give me the And1 guy.

Brad Miller gets along even worse with Shaq than he does with Rondo.

Sheed’s retiring, Perk’s hurt and Shelden Williams may not be walking through that door next season. As such, the Celtics will need to use free agency to bolster a frontcourt unit that — if the season were to start tomorrow — would have Luke Harangody as the first big off the bench.

Let’s just say the C’s need some frontcourt help pretty badly. And by “they need some frontcourt help pretty badly,” I mean “if the Celtics don’t pick up at least one legitimate big man in free agency, they have as much chance of winning next year’s NBA title as Brian Scalabrine does of being a first-ballot Hall of Famer.”

Here’s a list of veterans the Celtics could use to bolster their size for next year (young blood coming tomorrow or the next day):

Brad Miller (Note: Miller is reportedly the C’s number one target)
I know, I know: Celtics fans hate Brad Miller. I also know that Miller graduated first in his class from the Zydrunas Ilgauskas Academy of Speed. But he knows how to play, he’s a tough dude, and he’s got the size and skill to be a legitimate backup for Perk next season.

Shaquille O’Neal
Shaq-tis wasn’t the answer in Cleveland, but the Celtics wouldn’t need him to be a starter (at least, not once Kendrick Perkins returns from his injury… whenever that may be). The Big Diesel can still score and rebound, but his pick-and-roll defense is somewhere between miserable and destructive.

Udonis Haslem
There’s not a lot to dislike about Haslem: He knows his role, splashes midrange jumpers, and crashes the glass. My only qualm with a potential Haslem signing is that the Celtics may need more size. In the NBA, length kills. As of right now, the C’s have a backup power forward but no backup center.

Brendan Haywood
Physically, a perfect backup center. Seven feet tall, strong as an ox, and pretty mobile to boot. Listen to The Two Man Game’s description of Haywood (that’s a Mavericks blog, for those who don’t know): “Haywood is a franchise center. He’s a capable big that can catch and finish, he’s a top-notch interior defender, and he helps well.” Sounds good to me. The only problem is, the Celtics might not be able to get Hayward, even if they want to use their full mid-level exception on him: Mark Cuban is known to pay his centers a little more than market value.

Zydrunas Ilgauskas
Slow, slower, slowest. Still, despite footspeed that even Michael Sweetney frowns upon, Ilgauskas can play. He can stroke the basketball, he knows his limitations, and he’s a solid positional defender. But does he have anything left in the tank?

Jermaine O’Neal
Two words: The playoffs. Another two words: Walking corpse. Last two words: Please, no.

Matt Bonner
The perfect Scal replacement, except with a little more game… and a less pear-shaped body.

Drew Gooden
Gooden is still a solid player, stats-wise. But there’s just something about him that gives me pause. He was always beefing with Lebron and other teammates in Cleveland, is a bit selfish offensively and, as the Cleveland sports blog Waiting for Next Year put it, “His defensive lapses are legendary in this city.” I want 10 points and 8 boards a game, but not if it comes with the term “his defensive lapses are legendary in this city.”

Kwame Brown
Just in case Danny Ainge wants to sign one of the biggest busts in NBA history.

Rasho Nesterovic
Any time the best argument you can make to sign a player is “he’s not THAT bad,” you would hope not to sign him to anything more than the veteran’s minimum.

Joe Smith
Smith is washed up and no longer capable of playing a supporting role on a contender… and that was a year and a half ago.

Channing Frye
Frye has a player option at $2.1 million, but one would have to assume he’ll opt out. If he does, he’ll be an unrestricted free agent. What Frye lacks in toughness, he makes up for in three-point shooting ability.

Patrick O’Bryant
If you’re Wyc Grousbeck, is it worth it to spend the veteran’s minimum just to play a prank on your entire fanbase?

Darko Milicic
Can’t Ainge sign Kwame, O’Bryant and Milicic and — once they all pan out like everyone KNEW they were going to — the Celtics will have the best frontcourt on earth?

Ben Wallace
Wallace is a former Defensive Player of the Year. He has also lost at least a couple dozen steps and couldn’t score 10 points if you left him alone, in a gym, for 20 hours.

D.J. Mbenga
If the Celtics want to kick some judo ass, they’ll sign Mbenga to a max contract. If they want to win basketball games, not so much.

Juwan Howard
Older than my grandmother’s grandmother’s grandmother but, somehow, still effective.

Kurt Thomas
The only player on this list who might be as old as Juwan Howard. Still, you get the feeling Kurt will be able to defend the post even when he’s in a wheelchair. Which would kinda give new meaning to the term “pull the chair.”

Tim Thomas
Not only has he underperformed his entire career, but he’s now the old underacheiver who isn’t as talented as he one was and also spewed racial slurs that began a chair-tossing brawl at Denny’s (yes, that Denny’s). Whew, that was a mouthful.

Fabricio Oberto
Threatening to buy the naming right to the Zydrunas Ilgauskas Academy of Speed.

For a list of all free agents, and to see if I missed any, click here.

These guys all have bunnies, but — even better than a bunch of guys with bionic legs — the number one dunker reminds me of Mowgli from the Jungle Book.

Note: You don’t have to know what a passion bucket is to enjoy three Cornell players acting like teenagers in the middle of their first sex ed class.

Ryan Wittman, star of perhaps the best team in Cornell basketball history, will likely play for the Boston Celtics’ summer league team in Orlando. (Pioneer Press)

When 6-foot-7 former Eden Prairie and Cornell scoring star Ryan Wittman went undrafted by the NBA on Thursday, it was the 15th straight year that the Ivy League went without having a player taken in the draft. The last Ivy League player taken in the NBA draft was Jerome Allen from Penn in the second round in 1995.

Look for Wittman, who is being represented by Mark Termini, and also represents Washington Wizards coach Flip Saunders, to play for the Boston Celtics’ summer league team in Orlando, Fla.

I don’t know too much about Wittman other than that he’s a stud shooter, smooth scorer, and likely too slow and unathletic to thrive in the NBA. He’s also probably a lot smarter than I am. And, hopefully, his passion bucket will always be filled to the brim.