Ahh, Nate Robinson with the good ol’ salt-in-the-water trick. I tried it one time back in middle school. The problem was, the kid who was lucky enough to receive my delicious salt water gift didn’t exactly have a sense of humor. He spat the water out, sprinted directly to the principal’s office, and shortly thereafter middle school Jay was introduced to detention for the very first time. To this day, I’ve never forgiven that kid for his rat-out session. That goddamn Sally.

Note to Celtics: Don’t ask Nate Robinson for a glass of water. He may look like a waterboy, or a rookie, or a 4th-grader, but Tiny Tim has feelings too. So fill up your own glass, Shaq. Or at least ask Luke Harangody to do it for you.