(h/t Red’s Army)

The Celtics practiced yesterday, and Kevin Garnett did not want to be subbed out. According to Delonte West, Garnett was (literally) dragged off the floor.

I can see it now: Garnett screaming like a maniac, crawling on all fours and clapping his hands while Lawrence Frank (five foot nothing, a hundred nothing) grabs his ear and leads him off the court. In other words, I picture the scene as exactly what Veronica Vaughn did to Billy Madison after he said, “Kid can’t even read.” (Boston Herald)

“We’re normally the instigators, but we’ve been getting kind of a dose of our own medicine in the last few games,” guard Delonte West said.

“It was serious intensity in here today. It was almost playoff intensity in practice. For a little bit, he was trying to give KG (Kevin Garnett) some rest, and he wanted to be on the floor. Around this time of the year, normally veteran guys — you know, All-Star veteran guys — they’ll take all the rest they can get. So that made a big statement, him not even wanting to come off the floor. I mean, they had to literally drag him off the floor. That made a statement on where the intensity was today.

“It was more of, all right, the lights are down. With so many games happening so fast, things happen in the course of games, and you can’t really touch on them because you’re trying to get ready for the next one. But today was a gut check for everyone. We got to look each other in the eyes and see what we’re going to do here, what we’re going to do for these last couple of games.

“It starts with each individual. It’s time to buckle down and say, ‘Not my guy. Not tonight.’ That’s the motto of Celtics basketball, and I think we’ve gotten away from that.”

Stories like these are terrific—Kevin Garnett could lead an army of pacifists into war. But intensity on the practice court only goes so far. At some point, the Celtics need to step up and start winning games. Losing to the Grizzlies, at home, when Rudy Gay isn’t playing, during an Eastern Conference seedings race which could mean playoff life or death, shouldn’t happen. Losing to the Rockets, by 16 points, while letting Kyle Lowry look like the next Isiah Thomas (the player, not the GM), shouldn’t happen. Losing to the New Jersey Nets, under any circumstances, should not happen.

Practicing hard is a good start. But bringing that same intensity to the floor, every night, is what’s going to win the top seed and home-court advantage.

To all those who believe Shaq could have returned a long time ago if he wanted to, I offer you this: Shaq received a cortisone shot in his right foot on Tuesday, and is back in a walking boot. He could still return next week, reports Chris Forsberg, although that’s what the team has maintained for the past month. (ESPN Boston)

O’Neal traveled with the team on a recently completed three-game road trip with the goal of participating in walkthrough activities as he ramped up toward game action. But the foot that has been prone to flare-ups did so again, forcing the team to aggressively attack with the injection.

A source told ESPN Boston on Wednesday that O’Neal would hopefully be back on the floor by April 1, allowing him two weeks before the end of the regular season to shake rust and get acclimated with his teammates again.

No, Shaq’s not healthy. No, he’s not just resting his 39-year old body for the playoffs. No, he’s not just chilling at home, waiting until games mean something. He’s dealing with a real foot injury, one which hasn’t gotten much (any?) better after all his time off.

I’m starting to think Jermaine O’Neal will return before Shaq does. And I promise, I never thought I’d write the previous sentence. Now, we must ask ourselves: How much can the Celtics reasonably expect out of the two injured O’Neals? And can they win a title if neither of them operate anywhere near full strength?

Troy Murphy left practice today with a mild ankle sprain, and he’s now listed as day-to-day. If he misses Friday’s bout against the Charlotte Bobcats, the Celtics should really struggle to replace the zero points, zero rebounds, and zero assists he provided last night.

In better news, not that it should make a huge impact on Boston’s recent struggles, Von Wafer returned to practice after a strained right calf kept him sidelined for the past ten games. (ESPN Boston)

Wafer participated fully in the practice, including the scrimmage sessions, then returned to the court after for additional shooting. He was waiting to see how it responds to the activity.

“We’ll see how it feels in the morning,” said Wafer. “We’ll probably know better then.”

Wafer traveled with the team on its recently completed three-game road trip, but only engaged in light activities, mostly shooting drills. While Celtics coach Doc Rivers said before Wednesday’s loss to the Memphis Grizzlies that Wafer was still a ways out from returning, the reserve shooting guard is optimistic about his recovery thus far.

“I was thinking I’d probably be out for a few more days,” admitted Wafer. “I think I did come back faster than I thought.” …

“I’m thinking about getting back healthy and trying to come back stronger than when I left,” said Wafer. “That’s all I’m concerned about. If I get to play, or if I don’t, either way I won’t be disappointed. You never know what to expect.”

Wafer has three weeks to earn a playoff spot, a spot for which he will most likely compete against Sasha “I kind of look like the guy from Prison Break but also don’t look like him at all” Pavlovic. Apropos to nothing, here’s a picture of Pavlovic kissing his wife.

Was it the reaction to end all reactions? No, that was this. But Tony Allen’s reaction to beating the Celtics was more or less exactly what one would expect from Allen.

He celebrated like he just won the $304 million Megamillions jackpot. Like the price of gas just went down to less than a dollar. Like he just completed his Beanie Baby collection. Like he just beat his neighbor in Call of Duty: Black Ops. Like he just found out they were coming out with Avatar 2 in 2014. Like I finally ended this paragraph, which has gotten more than a little absurd.

His hands raised into the air, screams flew out of his mouth, and he raced straight to Kevin Garnett. Garnett went in to dap Allen (for those who aren’t “hip,” I suggest Urban Dictionary’s first or fifth definition…but definitely not the third definition, which would have been a very odd response from Garnett), but Allen was having none of that. Hug it out, he had decided. And with what looked to be a mix of emotions (I’d describe it one part surprise, one part “I just lost, I’d rather not do this right now”, and two parts love), Garnett returned the hug. Only Tony Allen, I thought, could celebrate a win with the losing team.

Next on Allen’s hug list was Paul Pierce. Then Doc Rivers. Then Delonte West, who also (lucky him) got the pleasure of Allen whispering something into his ear. By that time Allen’s coach, Lionel Hollins, was gesturing for Allen to come join his own team and Tommy Heinsohn was shouting, “This wasn’t practice, Tony! They’re not happy with you!”

“It was an emotional day,” Allen said after the game. “But I’m just happy with the win.”

Really, Tony? We couldn’t tell.

“I’m a Celtic. But unfortunately, I wear a Grizzlies jersey right now,” he continued, apparently forgetting he had signed in Memphis as a free agent, under his own free will.

In the game, Allen was a mixed bag of ups and downs, as Celtics fans might have expected. Just as he’s capable of ripping Rajon Rondo’s dribble and coasting in for a breakaway dunk, Allen’s also capable of shooting a jumper late in the game and missing by approximately two hockey rinks. He can make a coach cry one minute and jump for joy the next. That’s Tony Allen, just as all the post-game energy and hugs were.

While Allen made his first return to Boston since leaving the franchise, another former Celtic played like, in Doc Rivers’ words, “the baddest man on the planet.” Leon Powe scored 13 points in just 17 minutes, or, worded a little differently, 12 fewer points than Troy Murphy has scored in eleven games since joining the Celtics. Murphy played only four minutes yesterday, scoring zero points to go along with his zero rebounds, zero assists and two turnovers. By the end of the night, Celtics fans everywhere wondered whether signing Powe would have been more beneficial than signing Murphy.

“Yeah, we looked at [Powe],” Rivers told WEEI. “We just couldn’t take the chance, honestly, with all the injuries we’ve had.”

Ah, injuries. Those buggers. At least Jermaine O’Neal will rejoin the team on Monday, with a return probably coming shortly thereafter. I can’t promise he’ll help, but I can promise one thing: When he does return, I won’t celebrate as fiercely as Tony Allen did. Hell, I’m not sure I’ll celebrate at all.

Like last season, Doc Rivers will enter the offseason unsure of his coaching future. Danny Ainge has had multiple discussions with Rivers about returning next season, but Rivers does not want to commit yet. (CSNNE)

“Doc knows how I feel,” said Ainge. “I’m doing all I can to keep Doc around for as long as possible.” …

“I don’t believe Doc is necessarily looking forward to being a coaching free agent this summer,” Ainge said. “I really do believe he’ll be trying to decide whether to come back to Boston, or take some time off, maybe a year or two, and do some other things.”

A. Sherrod Blakely’s report mentions that a lockout could help to keep Rivers in Boston—as the theory goes, a lockout would allow Rivers to spend extra time with his family, then return to the Celtics once the lockout ends and his wife and kids get sick of him (just kidding, guys).