In a recent SLAM Online interview with Jared Sullinger (brought to our attention by our leader Jay, who has a real job and stuff), the rookie power forward revealed an interesting tidbit: Doc Rivers is apparently a psychic.
From Sullinger, via the SLAM interview:
“Coach Rivers, at the Final Four [in New Orleans], told my father, ‘I’m gonna get your son.’ I didn’t think I was gonna fall that far. I was like, ‘Yo, pops, I’m not going 21.’ And then that medical red flag stuff came out, all this stuff came out, and next thing you know I fell to 21. I’m like, ‘Pops, I guess I did fall to 21,’ so I was kind of in shock.”
Other things Doc Rivers totally saw coming (spoiler alerts, if you are way behind on your pop culture):
- The twist at the end of Dexter Season One.
- Harry was a Horcrux.
And, of course:
- Bruce Willis was a ghost. He was dead the whole time.
Seriously though guys, it’s blatantly obvious that one of two things is true. Either Doc Rivers is a psychic who can see the future, or he’s been talking to Danny Ainge, who is apparently in league with David Stern and a part of the Basketball Illuminati. Maybe not as deep as Jerry Buss, who got Dwight Howard and Steve Nash, but definitely deeper than, say, Mark Cuban, who whines about David Stern a lot and lost out on Deron Williams.
Either way, I think we can all agree that both a psychic and a member of the Illuminati are useful assets to any team, so let’s just be grateful that both Danny and Doc are employed by the C’s.
Also of note: Jared Sullinger calls his dad “pops” regularly which, absolutely no snark whatsoever, may be my new favorite thing about Jared Sullinger.
Follow Tom on Twitter: @Tom_NBA.