I’ve got to admit, this is the one time I could have broken news before Chris Forsberg. I’ve been playing pickup basketball with some kids who play for my old high school team, and one of them was stuttering a couple weeks ago: “I… I… I just p-p-played p-p-pickup with P-P-Paul H-H-Harris.”

I responded, “Okay, now calm down. He’s not THAT good. You don’t have to stutter like you just saw Michael Jordan. I mean, you’re blessed with ’the privilege’ of playing pickup against me twice a week and I haven’t seen you go gaga like that yet.”

The kid took three (very) deep breaths, took himself down a couple notches, and started speaking regular English.

“I just played against Paul Harris, man,” he said. “He’s been working out at L.A. Fitness for weeks now. He signed with the Red Claws.”

I nodded, replied “oh, I see,” and wondered to myself, why in the world did seeing Paul Harris, of all people, make this kid drool? Then I remembered myself in high school, the one time I played pickup basketball against someone noteworthy. And I use the word “noteworthy” loosely.

Long story short, Kenyon Martin’s half brother Richard Roby (or at least someone who claimed to be Kenyon Martin’s half brother Richard Roby, and I can’t imagine anyone who isn’t Roby would do that) came to my local park. We played a couple games. He was playing at Colorado at the time and was considered a first-round prospect, so he was pretty damn good. Good enough to murder me, at least. But I finished playing the games, walked home, and immediately called everyone I knew.

“Guess what I did today?”

“What?”

“Played basketball against Richardy Roby at Bliss Park!”

“Who the hell is Richard Roby?”

“Oh.”

Anyway, I remembered why this kid was so hyped about playing Paul Harris. As for the Red Claws? Lasme could be a Celtic within a month, whenever the Celtics get rid of Von Wafer. (I kid, I kid… but seriously.) Harris and Tiny Gallon are both intriguing prospects for the future. Harris is only a 6’2″ (or so) bruiser with limited guard skills, but he’s tough and super-athletic. And Gallon has a lot of talent, to go with his soft shooting touch in a big man’s body. If he can work himself into good shape, Gallon could become a real player.

I don’t see Mario West as a future Celtics call-up (even though I’d hate to have him defend me), and I know very little about Lamonte Ulmer (6’6″, 215-lb. wing from URI; averaged 12.1 ppg and 7.4 rpg in senior season) or Jamar Smith (6’3″ shooting guard from the University of Southern Indiana; D2 Player of the Year by at least one publication, averaging 21.6 ppg).

But damn it!, I could have broken news before Chris Forsberg. If only my stuttering, salivating source had been a little more reliable.

Get that weak stuff out of here. Oops, I just picked up a technical foul.

The Boston Celtics starters weren’t supposed to play in the second half. They were supposed to be granted some rest. But when a hapless first half ended with the Celtics trailing the Nets 55-48, plans changed. Eleven minutes later, the Celtics led 80-69 when the starters were substituted out after stunning an overwhelmed Nets team with a barrage of quick and powerful jabs. A 107-92 victory was well underway.

As the cheers rained down from an abnormally loud preseason crowd at the TD Garden, the message had been sent:

Miami Heat, the Celtics are ready for opening night.

• Game Notes:
  • Shaq continues to fit in. The Great Wall of Massachusetts solidified his hold on the starting role, and keeps working to change the perception that his presence held Cleveland back. The Diesel has been nothing but helpful in Boston, where his rebounding, outlet passes and paint presence have been a welcome addition. Tonight, he even hedged a screen-and-roll and forced a turnover. I pinched myself to make sure I wasn’t dreaming.
  • Contrary to what most folks thought, Shaq’s presence doesn’t clog the lane for the Celtics — it opens lanes. On one play, Ray Allen came off a curl with a head of steam towards the hoop. Even though Allen was wide open and headed straight for a layup, the Nets’ center didn’t fully commit to helping out. Why? It could have been that the Nets are awful defensively. That makes sense. But more likely, the Nets’ center was afraid to leave Shaq because Shaq’s a bigger threat than Kendrick Perkins ever was. Well, that and the Nets are awful defensively.
  • A couple plays into the third quarter, Paul Pierce sneaked around Kris Humphries and stole the ball. Pierce outlet passed the ball to Rajon Rondo, igniting the fast break. Rondo dumped it back to Pierce, who finished the play with a vicious dunk close enough to Johan Petro to make the Nets’ center blush. You can’t tell me Pierce had that type of rise in last year’s playoffs. You can’t.
  • I’ll be shocked if Von Wafer isn’t chosen as the Celtics’ 15th player. He found his sea legs (C legs?), and for the past three games has provided the offensive boost the Celtics expected when they signed him. Stephane Lasme will remain an inspiration and a great story, but the Celtics will likely assign him to the Maine Red Claws — if Lasme agrees.
  • Semih Erden isn’t your normal rookie. He makes at least two or three plays per game that scream “VETERAN!!!!” Today, he had two nice post moves around Derrick Favors. The second was a beautiful drop-step that was reminiscent of Kevin McHale. Okay, maybe not that veteran-esque.
  • For what it’s worth, Tommy Heinsohn salivated when he first saw Rajon Rondo play for the Celtics. He had the same feeling the other night watching Avery Bradley.
  • As Ray Allen tends to do, he got hot. The lesson, as usual: the only thing smoother than Ray Allen’s jumper is his bald dome piece.
  • Tiny Gallon’s new number? 63. He said it made him feel like an offensive linemen. I bet looking in the mirror gives him that same feeling.
  • Doc Rivers missed the game after having throat surgery. He couldn’t scream, he said. Lawrence Frank coached in his place. Frank has at least one thing he does better than Tom Thibodeau — unlike Thibs when filling in for Doc, Frank actually made substitutions.
  • One of the subs he made was matching Glen Davis and Kevin Garnett together in the same frontcourt. That gives the Celtics an interesting lineup full of shooters. Something to keep an eye on.
  • Mario West won’t make the Celtics, and he doesn’t deserve to. But if he ever defended me at the Y, I’d fake an injury.
  • Rajon Rondo’s last on my list of notes, but not least. Every day, I marvel at the way he dominates games without scoring points.
  • Kevin Garnett was aggressive. He was also whistled for a technical foul when he made an elbowing motion in the vicinity of Kris Humphries’ head. Even though the replay showed no malicious intent, I can’t fault the ref for calling a technical. When I saw the play live, I thought KG had plans to decapitate Humphries.

Yesterday, for the first time in more than a year, I found myself completely isolated from the Celtics and NBA world. I was helping my girlfriend move into her new apartment and had no way to check news. Computer? No internet. Phone? It died. TV? It wasn’t set up. I felt sick to my stomach. I always — always! — know every bit of Celtics news as soon as it breaks, but yesterday was the lone exception.

You can imagine my shock when I returned to civilization and the Celtics had signed Tiny Gallon to a non-guaranteed deal. It was just a strange signing, in so many ways. The Celtics don’t have any roster spots available, and the 6’9″, 300 lb. Gallon (who averaged 10.3 points and 7.9 rebounds last year in his only season at Oklahoma) couldn’t possibly play his way onto the team in the span of one week (right?). So the C’s must have signed him specifically to get a brief look at him and then they’ll likely try to stash him in Maine with the Red Claws. A good investment, considering his potential, but not your everday NBA transaction.

Since a lot of you probably don’t know much about Gallon, I’ve written an introduction. I’ve chosen to do it using Good Will Hunting quotes – partially because it makes my writing a little less boring, but mostly because I love that damn movie. Read more »

The Morning Walkthrough is a set of links to Boston Celtics articles throughout the internet, designed to get your day started the right way.

Injury prone.

A. Sherrod Blakely, CSNNE – “The Boston Celtics were optimistic that Jermaine O’Neal would play his way into the starting center job. With each passing day, that seems less and less likely to happen. First it was a sore left hamstring. Now he’s dealing with a sore back and a sore wrist that will keep him out of the preseason finale against New Jersey on Wednesday.”

Chris Forsberg, ESPN Boston – “After being limited for much of the past two weeks because of what he originally thought were back spasms, Celtics guard Delonte West revealed Tuesday that he’s actually pinpointed a different injury and expects to be back on the court later this week. ‘It turned out to be my glute muscles,’ said West, who has appeared in only three preseason games and has not stepped on the court since an Oct. 10 visit from Toronto. ‘It tightened up on me and I wasn’t quite sure where the pain was coming from. As time went on and we gave it a rest, the pain started to circulate to one region and we pinpointed the area. It ended up being my left glute. It’s just about 100 percent gone now.’”

Frank Dell’Apa, Boston Globe – “Garnett said the Celtics won’t pace themselves once the season starts. ‘I don’t think you can,’ he said. ‘I think the coaching staff, management, the way Doc manages our minutes, is a big thing, because he’s very, very smart the way he does that. Offdays are big for veteran teams. But to pace yourself is, to me, holding a certain level back and I don’t believe in that. I’ve never paced myself, I’ve never believed in pacing myself, nor would I ever.’”

A. Sherrod Blakely, CSNNE – “Just when it seemed the Boston Celtics were ready to start trimming their training-camp roster, a new face has come on the scene. Rookie Keigh ‘Tiny’ Gallon was signed to a non-guaranteed deal by the Celtics. Although the Celtics do have one roster spot available, look for the 6-foot-8, 300-pound big man – if he sticks with the C’s – to spend most of his time with the C’s D-League affiliate, the Main Red Claws. Gallon was drafted by the Milwaukee Bucks in the second round (47th overall) of last June’s NBA draft. However, Gallon became expendable when Milwaukee signed Drew Gooden via free agency and traded for former Sacramento Kings forward Jon Brockman. ‘If we had that 13th, 14th or 15th spot to develop, we would have kept him,’ Bucks General Manager John Hammond told CSNNE.com on Tuesday. ‘But what happens on draft night doesn’t always coincides with what happens the rest of the summer.’”

Chris Forsberg, ESPN Boston – “Celtics coach Doc Rivers underwent a biopsy Sunday morning at a Boston-area hospital to determine if lesions found on his throat were cancerous. The test results came back negative and Rivers can now joke about the scare. ‘I’m going to be around for a little while, it looks like,’ Rivers said after Boston’s open practice Tuesday night at TD Garden. ‘I’m sure that disappoints everyone.’ Rivers revealed how, at the urging of former Celtics coach Jim O’Brien, he’s undergone annual examinations of his throat and vocal chords for the past three years because of the stress placed on those areas by his profession. Doctors found a concerning spot during an examination three weeks ago, forcing Rivers to undergo the biopsy, which showed the lesions to be noncancerous.”

Steve Bulpett, Boston Herald – “Now with Shaquille O’Neal and Jermaine O’Neal supporting a healthier Kevin Garnett, there is every reason to believe the Celtics will be able to stem any late-inning rallies by the opposition. Where last year they could look like Hideki Okajima, at times, they are now more in the Daniel Bard realm. ‘I think Kevin this year can go back and be a post player,’ said coach Doc Rivers. ‘I thought he lacked that confidence with his health and all that. Shaq and J.O. can play there, and I think Paul has to get to the post more. We’re going to post Rondo up against smaller guards. We’re going to post Delonte (West) up. I told them all that. We have to get back to the post. We got away from it the whole second half of the year. We’ve got to get to it if we want to win games. We cannot rely on being an outside shooting team. It’s just not going to win for us, not in big games.’ The ancillary benefit is that, with a good post game drawing defensive attention, those outside shots get to be taken squared up with more space from the defenders.’ But as Shaq used to preach to Kobe Bryant in their Los Angeles days, it has to start with the inside game.”

Mike Petraglia, WEEI – “[Ray Allen's] message following Tuesday night’s intrasquad “Green-White” scrimmage at TD Garden was: Everyone knows we’re a team. Everyone wants to find out if Miami is, too. ‘I believe so because there’s never been an opening game that has been more heavily anticipated. I do believe that people are definitely excited to see them more than they’re excited about about seeing us. Truly they know, as a team, what we represented. The two teams are Eastern Conference powerhouses. It’s going to be a game.’ That game will be played next Tuesday night at TD Garden as LeBron James makes his official debut with the Heat, along with Chris Bosh and Dwyane Wade. ‘I think with the anticipation [after] our exiting the finals last year and then with the new additions to Miami, they overly hyped the game,’ Kevin Garnett added. ‘Yeah, I can see this has a lot of episodes, a lot of drama, if you will. It will have a lot of soap opera feel to it. Days of Our Lives, Another World, Santa Barbara. My grandmother was a big, big soap opera fan so it was either go outside or sit in there with her so I know that schedule quite well.’”

The Boston Channel – “NBA superstar and Boston Celtic Shaquille O’Neal stopped by the Sudbury Police Department recently to apply for a firearms permit, the website The Patch reported. The Celtics star has a long history serving roles with law enforcement in Arizona, Virginia and Florida. While playing for the Cleveland Cavaliers, O’Neal applied to be a special deputy with the Cuyahoga County sheriff’s office. The Sudbury police said the law does not allow them to disclose whether O’Neal applied for a firearms permit in their town. NBA superstar and Boston Celtic Shaquille O’Neal stopped by the Sudbury Police Department recently to apply for a firearms permit, the website The Patch reported. The Celtics star has a long history serving roles with law enforcement in Arizona, Virginia and Florida. While playing for the Cleveland Cavaliers, O’Neal applied to be a special deputy with the Cuyahoga County sheriff’s office. The Sudbury police said the law does not allow them to disclose whether O’Neal applied for a firearms permit in their town.”

Got a tip? An article you think should be included? Send an email to jayking@celticstown.com or hit me up on Twitter @CelticsTown.

I’ve just got one question: Who the hell is Tiny Gallon?

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